The Reel Life: Forking vandals edition

The upcoming royal wedding in the U.K. is a pretty big deal, as you may have heard. Royal weddings are massive events that require extensive planning, and there are a million things that have to go right, and even more millions of things that could potentially go wrong.

For example, some wiseacre could decide it's funny to graffiti the word "fork" all around Windsor for no discernible reason while the wedding planners are trying to make the place presentable.

Local police forces have narrowed down the range of suspects for the Dada-ist street artists to "two teenage offenders," although they also report having seen CCTV footage that appears to show a singular Banksy wannabe.

"It is fair to say this bloke is forking us off big time because as far as we are concerned we have our work cut out already on the big day," Windsor police said in a statement to the Express.

An absurdist graffito here or there is hardly the biggest quality-of-life issue in cities during normal times, but this is not a normal time. The utensil-themed tagging has caught the attention of no less illustrious a personage than Her Majesty herself, and we are most assuredly not amused.

"We have been told that if there is so much as a single ‘FORK’ on the walls of Windsor Castle that the Queen will blow a gasket so we are guarding it very well," the police reported.

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