The Reel Life: Corruption runs on Dunkin' edition
12 Dec 2017
Among the illegal bribes and kickbacks that Senator Joyce extracted from his position over the past were free dry cleaning, a free Jeep and — in the most Massachusetts turn of events ever — hundreds of pounds of Dunkin' Donuts coffee.
We can only assume that Senator Joyce's intent here was to drink all several hundred pounds of coffee himself, since it certainly doesn't have a high black market value in the Bay State, where there are Dunkin' Donuts franchises pretty much everywhere and the stuff is dirt cheap to start with. Being a full-time state legislator and simultaneously running a lucrative but hideously corrupt Tammany-Hall-style criminal enterprise out of your law office must require pulling a lot of all-nighters.
Which leaves us with just one question: If Senator Joyce would endanger his position in such a way for a drink that flows so freely through the cobbled streets of Beacon Hill, what would he do for a Klondike bar?
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